A freehand addition in spidery calligraphy gave the position of late arrivals, including the duchess of windsor 1896-1986 alongside the Duke."They've put them in Siberia," gasped one of the visitors, which was not quite fair. Though the public was not allowed to approach the tombstones (the plethora of "Out of Bounds" signs at Frogmore gave one the feeling history Sources of being back at school), a printed plan indicated who history Sources lay where. I knew from Prince Edward's recent TV hagiography that the late Duke of Windsor was also interred thereabouts. Sources Mrs W tutted at the weeds which are allowed to proliferate in parts of the grounds "That cow htm parsley should come out," she hissed. "And there are thistles growing in the mulch." Could it Sources be that Prince Charles has a hand in the history garden's management?To be honest, htm the interest of most visitors was morbid rather than horticultural: ignoring the profusion of flowering shrubs and history the 200,000 bulbs planted by htm Queen Mary, the majority of sightseers headed directly to the Sources Royal Mausoleum, for a gander at the life-size marble history effigies of Queen Victoria and htm her Prince Consort (still uncomfortably wearing spurs while htm supine on the slab).

A statue overlooking the recumbent forms of V & A was inscribed "David" (the family moniker for Edward VIII), but its profuse beard and beetling brow suggested this was a representation of the Old Testament monarch rather than the inventor of the Windsor tie-knot.In fact, the man who was king for 11 months lies in a plot outside the mausoleum, some distance from the graves of Victoria's many children. At one point during our visit, a Japanese Airlines plane roared over, much to the delight of a large party from the same country, with a yen to learn more about another island monarchy.Still, the gardens are very pleasant, with a meandering lake and a Gothic "ruin" built as a picturesque feature in the 18th century. You can admire her extensive collection of tea caddies on those rare occasions when it is open. Possibly the fact that Frogmore lies bang under Heathrow's incoming flight path, with jumbos passing overhead every 30 seconds, is one reason why it has fallen from regal favour. Like me, the Prez enjoys the idea of a cigar - but, unfortunately, smoking has been officially banned in the White House. His solution to this problem is simply not to light up.Still no luck with my campaign to gain admittance to the gardens of Buckingham Palace, 45 empty acres in the centre of London - but Mrs W and I did get into another royal property the other day.

The 30-acre plot of Frogmore House, in the shadow of Windsor Castle, is open to the public for all of four days a year - though it seems unlikely that any members of the royal family have spent much time at Frogmore since the Queen Mum passed part of her honeymoon there in 1923.Admittedly, Queen Mary, the frosty-looking one who died in 1953 (it is intriguing to conjecture what she would have made of recent royal shenanigans), was rather a fan of the place. Among the pricey ephemera being touted is a pair of gold cuff links fashioned after cigar butt-ends - the ash is made of platinum.But I did learn something of value from a back issue of the periodical, which featured a remarkable photograph taken by a long-lensed paparazzo, of President Clinton chomping on a cigar of Churchillian dimensions while tangling with the world's problems at his desk in the Oval Office. Such padding is required to interleave the prodigious amount of advertising aimed at fat-cat fans of a big smoke. But the rest of this bulky journal is a bit of a disappointment After all, there is only so much you can say about cigars. Much of the paper is taken up with bland profiles, rather in the style of in-flight magazines, of prominent stogy-suckers. We learn, for example, that actor Matt Dillon favours Montecristos, while model Lauren Hutton is partial to H Upmanns. Running to 354 glossy pages, the current issue is much the same size as a phone book.